How Did I Get Here?

Usually, I experience peace and contentment in my journey throughout life. So, when I recently began to feel an unrest that would not go away, I decided to look a bit deeper at what was going on. I realized that I was experiencing anxiety caused by a pulling desire to accomplish more – to move further into full living – without knowing how to move forward. And there’s nothing worse to a Sagittarius than feeling stuck. How did I get to this point? Life has been great. I’ve been doing fulfilling work. What was the problem? The problem was/is that transition doesn’t always feel good, and the uncertainty that often accompanies change can be stifling. So, now that I’m aware of the problem, what do I do to get through this? Trying to get to the answer prompted serious reflection on where I am in life right now.

Currently, I live in Los Angeles and work two part-time jobs. Years ago, a gripping desire to move to California took root within the depths of my soul. I sent my heart into the universe and did what I could to make the move possible. From there, magic paved the way for the circumstances surrounding my move to exceed my expectations. When I first moved to Cali, I held a full-time management position at a language school. It was great, but there were some other gifts and talents I knew I was able to offer students. I had always thought about having multiple part-time jobs within my profession so that I could work in both the administrative and academic sectors of education. How this would happen, and how I’d still be able to pay bills, eat, and buy tennis balls if it did, was not so clear. However, I sent this desire into the cosmos, did what I could, and the magic happened. I was able to scale back my full-time job while adding an academic-based college position to my schedule. It worked out better than I could have orchestrated alone; and – I’d like you to know – I’ll be bringing a fresh can of balls to my next tennis match. In addition to these amazing (and scary) life-changes, there were some other things I desired, such as relationship goals and creative experiences. I desired a shift in the way I experience romantic and platonic relationships, and I also knew it was vital for me to begin expressing myself through music again. As you can probably guess by now, I submitted these cosmic requests, did what I could, and magic took over.

This exhaustive contemplation helped me realize that I am where I am because, at some point, it is where I said I wanted to be. Even if it doesn’t seem like it, I’ve worked to get here. I am not stuck, I am in the process. Any time I’ve expressed a desire and worked toward it, the universe has stepped in to bring these desires to pass in a way that exceeded my hopes. Why would that stop now? As I begin to understand how all of this works, I have taken great comfort in recognizing a pattern. I must get clear about what I want… and work toward it. Then, I get to watch God work and experience the magic of life.

The same theory applies when I realize that I’m experiencing something that doesn’t serve my highest self. I have to own up to the fact that it’s something I asked for and worked towards, even if I did so subconsciously (I actually think much of life is created in this state). My actions (which include inaction) have brought about my experience. And if the experience is one I’m not interested in having, (fortunately) I get to make another choice, get to work, and prepare to be amazed.

Talk to you later…. I got some work to do.

 

6 thoughts on “How Did I Get Here?

  1. Reading with interest….I’d hate to of all things suggest a book but if you get time ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck’ May be of interest to you…..don’t be mislead by the title 😉

    Like

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